Ok, so I am still in my pjs knowing that if I don't get up soon I am going to be late for work. But DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, in my Florida Evans' voice, it is cold as a witches' tit. I think we have really jacked the environment up. One day it is sixty-five and the next is twenty-nine. Are you serious? Good Lawd. It doesn't add to my lack of exercise motivation these days. While I'm a 3rd degree black belt and a marathoner, I have been training for my latest physical feat a Couch Potato triathlon. I just have little motivation. Last night, I attempted (notice the key word here attempted) to do the INSANITY workout. That fool is a damn nut. Shaun T., the said fool, has you coming out the gate high kicking, running suicides, doing this dumb ass move call the Heisman and a bunch of other gut busting moves. I am huffing and puffing and then this bama says "great, you have just finished the warm-up, now let's kick up a notch." GTFOH (that's get the fudge outta here for you non texters).
Thirty minutes in I collapsed on the couch and found myself "watching" INSANITY, instead of engaging in it. The old me would have been disappointed in myself for not finishing-the new me doesn't give a diggity darn. Besides, I wasn't ready to clean my dinner up off the floor from his workout. I am still the Little Engine that Could, so I will be back. But for now I will resume training for my Couch Potato race.
So part of my Couch Potato status requires me to watch really bad tv. My latest obsession for the last couple seasons is The Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA). Where in the hell do I start? One of my sorors said it best when she described it as watching a train wreck. You know it is bad but yet your eyes are still glued to it. I know I should feel ashamedbut I don't. I feel like after a day of cerebral gymnastics we can all stand to lighten up. Below are just a few of my musings on RHOA. Please feel free to add to the list! Have an awesome Tuesday and someone please turn up the damn heat-BRRRRRR
RHOA-Things that make you say HMMM???
1. Kim- Who in the HAYLE told Kim she could sing, her wig looks good, or that she even remotely looks like she is only 31? Riddle me that Batman. I'm not gonna lie I thought Tardy for the Party was cute. But c'mon son, another song. I think she should just settle for being a Vanilla Ice one hit wonder than trying to be an actual singer. Or better yet, maybe she could try GETTING A REAL JOB! My bad it is a rough economy-maybe Gold Digga is considered entrepreneurship these days. Just a thought. But wait..she is a nurse...Right!!!!
2. Phaedra, Phaedra, Phaedra-Ok, now I give her props for being gainfully employed but that is about where the props stop. How you going to have a boughetto ass baby shower where you are rocking rhinestone eyelashes/eyebrows and a bouquet of roses in your hair? That was a hot mess. Then, when folks ask you how far along are you in your pregnancy, all of sudden you go all Rain Man and can't give a straight answer. Then before you deliver your FULL TERM baby, you talking some foolishness about maternal death. WTF??? You ain't foolin a soul Phaedra. As for your delectable eye candy husband Apollo. Honey, he is dumb as a box of rocks and has clearly put you in the "sponsor" category. Oh well, in the words of the late Tupac, "I ain't mad at ya."
3. Cynthia-I have always loved Cynthia's work as a model. But please tell me what is her purpose on this show? She stands around looking all vacant. Half the time I forget she is a cast member. I find her fiancee Peter way more entertaining, especially when he digs in the tails of the other housewives. But that being said, someone please tell me why does her hair always look so JACKED up? Her weaves always look homemade and when she wears it slicked back, it looks like she needs some of that funky brown gel on her kitchen. I mean you are in the ATL- I know that there is a beauty supply store in walking distance.
4. Sheree-Ok, first off I think she is in fabulous shape for a woman her age. She has killer arms and an awesome looking back as far as muscle definition. I applaud for trying to find something to do with herself. However, I am just not too sure if actor, fashion designer, or dancer should be any of the things she tries. Ummm I know noone is going to "check you boo" but you might want to look at a lucrative hustle. And that love doctor she attempted to date-W-O-W. The landing strip in the middle of his head would have been enough for me to cancel his tired behind. And did anyone besides me notice that Sheree all of sudden has a 24 year old daughter who bears a striking resemblance to her "assistant" from the first season? Hmmmm *pinkie next to my lip like Dr. Evil* Just wondering.....
5. Nee Nee-She is perhaps the loudest and most uncouth of all the chicks on RHOA and she is my FAVORITE (I do like Kandi and see her as down to earth but Nee Nee is entertaining) Between her getting her nostrils reshapened to dealing with her deadbeat son who strikingly resembles Biz Markie, Nee Nee keeps it real. The whole drama with her husband is sad but I appreciate the fact that she keeps it moving. I am still dying at the fact that she told the surgeon, "Please don't make my nose look like Dwight's" and straight ghetto style approached Dwight about the money.
I can write a whole blog about THE RHOA and Dwight but I will save that.
So Talk to Me Blog Land- What are your thoughts about RHOA? What is your guilty pleasure outside of tv? or What is the last thing that made you have a gut busting laugh? As always this is boughetto virtual therapy, so your ACTUAL COMMENTS :-) would be appreciated. I have already enjoyed all the feedback I have received. Stay warm and Peace Out.
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